Friday, August 20, 2004
The Final Chapter: Jackie Phone Home
Sunday: On Sunday morning, I was a bit bleary-eyed due to lack of sleep, but I was definitely excited to see what whitewater rafting was all about. After a 90 minute drive north to The Forks, we arrived at Magic Falls campground to get equipped with all of our rafting needs. After I put on my wet suit top and life jacket, I was pretty sure I'd never be able to exhale again. I got my paddle and we waited for our group name to be called before we boarded the blue school bus that would take us to the head of the river. They seemed to encourage a high level of machismo, as the group leader (who, in my opinion, looked exactly like Danny Bonaduce) got excited when the first group to be called responded loudly with a "Hoo-Ra" sort of yell. Surprisingly, we thought it would be funny to go against the grain a little. We were the last group standing in the parking lot, and when they called out "Hufton", we responded with a half-hearted, high-pitched "Weeeeeeee". Danny Bonaduce wasn't impressed.
Once the bus dropped us off at our starting point next to the river, our guide Jeff went through some basic commands with us. Brendan decided to tell Jeff about his past rafting experience.
Brendan: Is there going to be a lot of down time? Last time we went, we hit the rapids right away and then just went through the calm waters for the last hour and a half. It was sooo boring.
Jeff: Oh.
With this comment, Fernald turned our once uber-enthusiastic guide temporarily stoic. This is how he earned the nickname "Debbie Downer" for the weekend. I think Brendan prefers the nickname "Ferny Downer", but this is not so unlike the time we started referring to him as "Martha Vila", borrowing from Martha Stewart and Bob Vila to reference Brendan's passion for both home improvement and home decoration. He attempted to change the name to "Bob Stewart", but that sounded a little too "normal". I digress.
After easing our way through some class 2 rapids, we approached our first big challenge...a challenge that Irf and I didn't really get to see, because we were facing backwards as our raft dropped into the hole. Subsequently, Irf and I were dumped into the water simultaneously, which provided loads of entertainment for the guys who remained onboard. Luckily, Jack and Fernald would later pay their dues as well, getting tossed into the water on separate occassions. When we finished up, we enjoyed a nice dinner back at the campground and later made our way back to the Fernald Cabin.
The next two days would include lots of golf, cigars, (editing paid for by Jack Oolders), kneeboarding, (editing compliments of MesteeBlogger), video games, Irfan punching me in the face, poker, and any other manly activities we could think of. However, against the wishes of the blogger readers and all participants in the bachelor party, Jack did have several extended conversations with Meg via telephone. The end.
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Once the bus dropped us off at our starting point next to the river, our guide Jeff went through some basic commands with us. Brendan decided to tell Jeff about his past rafting experience.
Brendan: Is there going to be a lot of down time? Last time we went, we hit the rapids right away and then just went through the calm waters for the last hour and a half. It was sooo boring.
Jeff: Oh.
With this comment, Fernald turned our once uber-enthusiastic guide temporarily stoic. This is how he earned the nickname "Debbie Downer" for the weekend. I think Brendan prefers the nickname "Ferny Downer", but this is not so unlike the time we started referring to him as "Martha Vila", borrowing from Martha Stewart and Bob Vila to reference Brendan's passion for both home improvement and home decoration. He attempted to change the name to "Bob Stewart", but that sounded a little too "normal". I digress.
After easing our way through some class 2 rapids, we approached our first big challenge...a challenge that Irf and I didn't really get to see, because we were facing backwards as our raft dropped into the hole. Subsequently, Irf and I were dumped into the water simultaneously, which provided loads of entertainment for the guys who remained onboard. Luckily, Jack and Fernald would later pay their dues as well, getting tossed into the water on separate occassions. When we finished up, we enjoyed a nice dinner back at the campground and later made our way back to the Fernald Cabin.
The next two days would include lots of golf, cigars, (editing paid for by Jack Oolders), kneeboarding, (editing compliments of MesteeBlogger), video games, Irfan punching me in the face, poker, and any other manly activities we could think of. However, against the wishes of the blogger readers and all participants in the bachelor party, Jack did have several extended conversations with Meg via telephone. The end.
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