Thursday, August 19, 2004
Part 2: Carl the Cabbie Provides the Key to Wedded Bliss
Hey, look...a comment from a regular blog reader:
What the heck, Meestee? A bachelor party is no excuse for ignoring your blog. Unless, of course, you are in a relationship with said blog, which would make updates illegal during the extended party weekend.
hmm.
Neglected Reader
Dearest NR,
I intended to write updates from Brendan's cabin, but even Fernald's masterful computer skills were unable to get us online. Afterall, we were surrounded by lots of...uh, nature. I feel like I have a pretty good relationship with my blog -- she trusts me to not go around making entries on other blogs and I trust that she won't give anybody the password to write on her. It works out well. She wasn't even mad when I couldn't connect over the weekend.
-Brian
Now, back to Part 2 of our Bachelor Party mini-series...
Saturday: Early on Saturday morning (some might consider it Friday night) we found ourselves in a minivan cab headed home via Storrow Drive. It was in the cab that Jack was given a life lesson by the cab driver, who insisted that the key to a good marriage was making sure that your wife is submissive. This man had apparently not been able to do so and was trying to give Jack fair warning. In a thick accent, he gave Jack some sort test to use on Meg, where Jack would ask Meg for 3 of her paychecks over 3 straight weeks. Apparently, if she gave them up with no questions asked, she would be fit to marry. Jacko didn't exactly buy into this line of reasoning, but went along with the cab driver because, at the time, Jack was (editing paid for by Jack Oolders). As soon as we got home, Jack went into the kitchen, (editing paid for by Jack Oolders), rolled around on the ground, and (editing paid for by Jack Oolders). I had never seen him do that before, and I hope I never have to see it again.
We loaded up the car around 10:30 and headed up to Maine shortly after. I had to sit on the hump in the backseat between Jack and Irf, which got pretty uncomfortable after a few hours. Luckily, after we stopped at BK, I got shotgun and Hufton took my seat for the last hour or so. When we got to the cabin, we unloaded our stuff and then went to Wal-Mart to get groceries for the weekend and also some poker chips. Jack had warned me that there was a guy in a pink T-shirt walking around that smelled as if he hadn't taken a shower in weeks. He pointed him out from a distance and told me to avoid him at all costs. We made our final purchase and the five of us (temporarily without Steve) headed toward the checkout area. Suddenly, it was as if we had hit a wall. Our hands went straight over our noses and mouths to protect us from the overwhelming smell. We spotted the unmistakable point of origin: Pink T-shirt guy. The most troubling thing was that he was at least 20 feet away from us, possibly further. It was the most astonishing display of body odor that any of us had ever been subjected to. On second thought, I guess you can't really "display" body odor, but either way, it was bad.
We went back to the cabin and played some no-limit Texas Hold 'em Poker until about 12:30 or so. We played the last hand and I was victorious, pulling out a straight on the last card to complete my comeback victory. We went to bed and set the alarms for 6:30 so we could head further up north for some whitewater rafting in the morning. To Be Continued....
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What the heck, Meestee? A bachelor party is no excuse for ignoring your blog. Unless, of course, you are in a relationship with said blog, which would make updates illegal during the extended party weekend.
hmm.
Neglected Reader
Dearest NR,
I intended to write updates from Brendan's cabin, but even Fernald's masterful computer skills were unable to get us online. Afterall, we were surrounded by lots of...uh, nature. I feel like I have a pretty good relationship with my blog -- she trusts me to not go around making entries on other blogs and I trust that she won't give anybody the password to write on her. It works out well. She wasn't even mad when I couldn't connect over the weekend.
-Brian
Now, back to Part 2 of our Bachelor Party mini-series...
Saturday: Early on Saturday morning (some might consider it Friday night) we found ourselves in a minivan cab headed home via Storrow Drive. It was in the cab that Jack was given a life lesson by the cab driver, who insisted that the key to a good marriage was making sure that your wife is submissive. This man had apparently not been able to do so and was trying to give Jack fair warning. In a thick accent, he gave Jack some sort test to use on Meg, where Jack would ask Meg for 3 of her paychecks over 3 straight weeks. Apparently, if she gave them up with no questions asked, she would be fit to marry. Jacko didn't exactly buy into this line of reasoning, but went along with the cab driver because, at the time, Jack was (editing paid for by Jack Oolders). As soon as we got home, Jack went into the kitchen, (editing paid for by Jack Oolders), rolled around on the ground, and (editing paid for by Jack Oolders). I had never seen him do that before, and I hope I never have to see it again.
We loaded up the car around 10:30 and headed up to Maine shortly after. I had to sit on the hump in the backseat between Jack and Irf, which got pretty uncomfortable after a few hours. Luckily, after we stopped at BK, I got shotgun and Hufton took my seat for the last hour or so. When we got to the cabin, we unloaded our stuff and then went to Wal-Mart to get groceries for the weekend and also some poker chips. Jack had warned me that there was a guy in a pink T-shirt walking around that smelled as if he hadn't taken a shower in weeks. He pointed him out from a distance and told me to avoid him at all costs. We made our final purchase and the five of us (temporarily without Steve) headed toward the checkout area. Suddenly, it was as if we had hit a wall. Our hands went straight over our noses and mouths to protect us from the overwhelming smell. We spotted the unmistakable point of origin: Pink T-shirt guy. The most troubling thing was that he was at least 20 feet away from us, possibly further. It was the most astonishing display of body odor that any of us had ever been subjected to. On second thought, I guess you can't really "display" body odor, but either way, it was bad.
We went back to the cabin and played some no-limit Texas Hold 'em Poker until about 12:30 or so. We played the last hand and I was victorious, pulling out a straight on the last card to complete my comeback victory. We went to bed and set the alarms for 6:30 so we could head further up north for some whitewater rafting in the morning. To Be Continued....
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