Thursday, August 25, 2005
What time do you go to the dentist? Tooth Hurty.
I'm back. Stop your crying. I've been really focused on trying to get a job, because when Friday comes around and there's no paycheck to be found, it's a little disconcerting. I'll admit, it's nice to be around during the day and have the flexibility to do what I want when I want, though I'm still limited to 9-5 for communication with potential employers. I'm sure this is all very exciting for you.
I had a dentist appointment in Londonderry this morning, so I headed back to L'town last night to save myself the morning commute. I feel like the dentist's office is stuck in a time warp. Highlights magazine, Huey Lewis and The Eurythmics being piped through the speakers at a reasonable volume. Maybe there wasn't Highlights magazine, but I can't be sure because I was in the waiting room for less than a minute. I'm telling you, though: time warp.
The woman explained that she would be inspecting my gums, adding that "anything 3 and under is normal". I guess she was just eyeballing it and assigning a number to the health of the gums on the sides and top of each tooth, which she would then call out to a woman who was writing it all down.
"Three, Three, Two..."
I'm okay so far.
"Two, Three, Two..."
Oh yeah, my gums are healthy.
"Two, Four, Four..."
Jeez, I've been neglecting the upper right side of my small, small mouth.
"Three, Two, Four..."
Oh crap, another four. Just call me Jerry Gingivitis, poster boy for gum disease.
As it turns out, she wasn't too concerned with the state of my gums, so my anxiety was slightly diminished. Now it was time to clean the teeth.
"What flavor do you want? We have strawberry, bubblegum, cherry, and mint."
Okay, Brian, you know you want strawberry, but you're an adult, so that would be silly. Everybody laughs when you get strawberry milkshakes, nobody thinks it's normal that you like strawberry milk. Bubblegum is out of the question. Man, that strawberry would be nice. No! Act like an adult!
"I'll have the mint."
I'm so mature. They're bound to stop calling me "Honey" within the next few years.
I'm disappointed that I missed National Punctuation Day. I couldv'e learned a thing or two.
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I had a dentist appointment in Londonderry this morning, so I headed back to L'town last night to save myself the morning commute. I feel like the dentist's office is stuck in a time warp. Highlights magazine, Huey Lewis and The Eurythmics being piped through the speakers at a reasonable volume. Maybe there wasn't Highlights magazine, but I can't be sure because I was in the waiting room for less than a minute. I'm telling you, though: time warp.
The woman explained that she would be inspecting my gums, adding that "anything 3 and under is normal". I guess she was just eyeballing it and assigning a number to the health of the gums on the sides and top of each tooth, which she would then call out to a woman who was writing it all down.
"Three, Three, Two..."
I'm okay so far.
"Two, Three, Two..."
Oh yeah, my gums are healthy.
"Two, Four, Four..."
Jeez, I've been neglecting the upper right side of my small, small mouth.
"Three, Two, Four..."
Oh crap, another four. Just call me Jerry Gingivitis, poster boy for gum disease.
As it turns out, she wasn't too concerned with the state of my gums, so my anxiety was slightly diminished. Now it was time to clean the teeth.
"What flavor do you want? We have strawberry, bubblegum, cherry, and mint."
Okay, Brian, you know you want strawberry, but you're an adult, so that would be silly. Everybody laughs when you get strawberry milkshakes, nobody thinks it's normal that you like strawberry milk. Bubblegum is out of the question. Man, that strawberry would be nice. No! Act like an adult!
"I'll have the mint."
I'm so mature. They're bound to stop calling me "Honey" within the next few years.
I'm disappointed that I missed National Punctuation Day. I couldv'e learned a thing or two.
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