Mestee Blogger

Baby, it's Wednesday. You know what that means...awww yeah, time for letters.

Dearest Impersonator,
keep up the good work. It is nice to think that while i struggle to get internet service in my new apartment, my friends still feel wanted. Speaking of feeling unwanted... no call while you're in p'mouth brian? Is this because i haven't called you up just to talk lately.

De Echte Jack Oolders

Jack,
I guess this letter is directed less toward me and more towards Irfan...uh, I mean, whoever this mysterious impersonator might be. In reality, I've gotten a little lazy with checking IP addresses to see if anyone is being grossly misrepresented by an imposter. Jack, you were. Just thought I'd let you know. Also, when I was in Portsmouth, I was under the impression that you still lived in Londonderry. My "B".

The Real Brian Adams

Brian,
Maybe you should consider a job running simple errands for people. Did you just volunteer to be Mike and lauren's processed meat slave or do you just do this for free. If the latter is the case, then could you deliver a gordita and soft taco to the University of Michigan, care of Jeremy "soft taco" Hufton?

Excitedly,
Grande en Los Pantalones

Grande,
While this is not a bad idea for a business, I plan on keeping an eye out for more lucrative and potentially rewarding careers. While Mike did allow me to "keep the change", it was hardly enough to combat today's outrageous gas prices. You might also be interested to know that gas is not the only product with recent skyrocketing prices. The raviolis that I buy at shaw's have inexplicably gone from the reasonable price of $2.29 per bag to a whopping $3.99 per bag. What gives, ravioli makers? Why can't you let me enjoy your tasty treat for a reasonable price? Why must you charge gourmet prices for a food fit for the common man? I will never forgive you. Oh, Hufton, your gordita and soft taco have been sent via Fed Ex, they should reach you shortly.

-Brian


Last night, my Dad and I met at Bertucci's in Woburn for dinner, then headed over to a seminar at the Holiday Inn. The topic of this free seminar was something along the lines of "How to Start Your Own eBay Store". My Dad and I went in with the idea that it could potentially be terrible, so we decided that we'd sit towards the back in order to make for a quick getaway if need be. Our plans were thwarted when we saw that the last three rows on either side of the middle aisle had been taped off and that the seats in front of the taped-off rows were already taken. We took our seats toward the middle and luckily, the seminar was actually well put together. It was led by a guy named Paul who had a few amusing habits that kept me entertained. He would talk for a while, then give the crowd a very obvious fill-in-the-blank statements like this:

Paul: Remember, like they say, buy low and sell....what?
Crowd: High.

My inner public comedian wanted to shout out "drugs!", but I refrained. Paul also had a strange way of sneaking in unnecessary biographical information about himself:

"I'm a very impatient person. My wife said to me 'Paul, even though you've lost 30 to 40 pounds in the last 6 to 8 months, Eight Minute Abs is too long for you...you're waiting for Four Minute Abs!'"

Or this gem:

"Ebay doesn't care if you're short or tall, if you're fat or thin, if you have a disability, or if you were adopted, as I was at a very young age."

Anyway, like I said, the overall presentation was very informative, and I'm going back to take an additional class tomorrow. Perhaps Paul will find a way to sneak in information about his favorite cookies or what he wore for Halloween when he was 10. I guess I'll just have to wait and find out.
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